I've been reading Iron Man fic and I haven't even seen the movie yet. :( [kalpurna]

So I suddenly realized I hadn't updated in foreverrrrr. What are the haps, flist? Not much is new with me! I cleaned the apartment, which I may have mentioned. My roommate's kinks are extremely not okay. Kanye West is hilarious and I love him. I feel like Pete's idolization of him is so, so, ridiculously appropriate. If I wrote fiction about someone like Pete, I would definitely have him see someone like Kanye as a role model. One of the best things about being involved in an RPS fandom has been realizing how much of real life is weirder and more awesome than fiction. Like, I always feel like a creepster when I start talking about, I don't know, the plot arc of Ryan Ross's life, but at the same time it's kind of true.

That's something I've been thinking about, a way RPF is different than other fandoms. With RPF, you're trying to draw meaning and metaphor out of things that actually happened, instead of picking out themes that were actually deliberately put there, you know? And yet, that's kind of what you have to do with your own life, to gather meaning out of it. While I was dealing with crushing depression and a self-image crisis, a gigantic fucking mirror fell on me in my bathroom while I was naked. And the people we write about are doing this to themselves at the same time that we're doing it to them, because they're artists, it's what they do, so my narrative of Ryan Ross's life bumps up against and interacts with Ryan Ross's own narrative of his life.

Um, I'm not sure how I got here from Kanye West calling me Squid Brains.

Cobra Starship had a ridic chat the other day and revealed an uncomfortable level of familiarity with

fbr_trash. My favorite part: [23:43] LaHoya (VickyTofCS): my operation is a sensitive subject. I like to leave victor in the past, thank you. Victooooria I am sorry people are so shitty but I love the way you deal with them. Also someone asked Gabe who he masturbated to and he said "william is no secret". Ummmmm this fandom is the most insane.

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COBRAS ARE MY FAVOURITE EVER.

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I KNOWWWW HOW ARE THEY SO GREAT

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Oh Kanye,

I am going to make "squid brains" my new insult of choice.

RPS is so addicting for the same reason. Yes, I love aspects of my life and am proud of the work I do and am pretty damn good at it if I do say so myself but there is satisfaction in taking the elements of real lives that we see in the strobe of public image and weaving them together in clever ways. Looking at old journals of a Brendon Urie mentioning being cripplingly lonely puts perspective on songs where he's "never been more scared to be alone" and the fact that he's apparently the groupie bicycle of Panic ("Ride that dick.") and has a roommate even though he's rich and can live on his own. I could never get into a non RPF after this I'm afraid. I mean I'll always like my little sci fi shows but never enough to write stories and anylize every little thing. It's too interesting to think about Brendon's epic love for Ryan or William Beckett's baby & family/wanna be a rock star angst.

I've switched back and forth from RPF to media fandoms and back again and few times and there's always this huge culture shock every time where I'm readjusting my sense of canonicity and characterization and plotting and all that good stuff.

I'm kind of curious where I'll end up next! It's so easy to fall into a pattern of thinking "this is how texts work" and then whoops, reboot, texts don't work that way anymore.

I have already started ending sentences that way. "Hey, pass me the salt, squid brains." ...It is probably a good thing I live with a fangirl.

Yeah, it's just so much more complicated than traditional fanfiction, you know? The plot twists are weirder, the amount of information you get is massive, and you have to pick out which parts are relevant. An hour of carefully-planned canon a week? Are you shitting me?! There are things I love about traditional fanfic too, but I hadn't expected to love so many things about RPF.

Also, where's that Cobra chat. Oh Gabe and his very real lust for William Beckett. Bless.

Seconded.

All the transcripts and screencaps I found were over in the comments of an fbr_trash post (http://community.livejournal.com/fbr_trash/1894571.html).

...omg so many comments XD

I'm not sure you're giving this post your all, Hannah.

Also, my want for batman fic right now is not at all my fault.

CAN ANYONE HONESTLY SAY THAT??

To be honest, I'm a little sad that we're not shipping Tony/Peter anymore. Ostrich! :(

RPF is hypermeta, constantly.

They might be thinking critically about stuff, and we are too. Theres ... a meaning, I guess, that we can't get from fiction.

Thinky thoughts are delish.

And Ryan Ross is stoned, so he is probably thinking things on a level we can't even comprehend. Our lives, so complicated!

I know! And we have to be able to pick out the meanings we think are right. Or at least do it for a fic and then we might have to go in a new direction for thwe next fic we read or write.

Its like FPF canon, only multiplied.

Our canon is organic, because its 'real'(for totally varying levels of realness) and can't really be retconed. Like X was at club Z. We can say that X was at club Z for so many reasons, but no tv script writer can say at a later point that X was really at the zoo.

And so there's this rich symbolism we have to ascribe to many different things, often at odds with other interpretations other fans have.

lso someone asked Gabe who he masturbated to and he said "william is no secret".

I think I just made an audible squeaking noise /o\

Oh Gabe, I love you a ridiculous amount.

He's my faaaavorite. I can't believe I ever thought he was creepy! Well, he is creepy, but you know what I mean.

I understand well - it's when you stop being afraid you'll end up in Gabe's basement, and start hoping you do!

I wish I'd been more into the fandom when I met him before a show last year - we were too shy to really say anything (though it was still an improvement over just staring silently, and with hindsight creepily, at William when he walked past /o\). Though that may be for the best, I'm still not sure I'd manage to say something appropriate to him now.

With them touring at Panic, I'm guessing Gabe won't just be hanging around outside the venue before the shows this time, dammit :)

These ideas really are so fascinating. This is my first rpf fandom and before bando I really didn't think rpf was for me and then I got sucked in completely - and it is about these constructed narratives, whether they're constructed by fandom or by the people we write about or both. It's about reading celebrity as text, and I think that's something our whole culture does to a certain extent, but not with the self-awareness that media fandom has. I think about this a lot and never seem to develop a coherent meta post or anything, but it's such interesting stuff. I still frequently feel totally creepy about bandom in general, but at the same time I am seemingly powerless to resist it.

On another note, where is this Cobra chat? It sounds awesome. CobraStarship, I so love you BEST.

Yeah, bandom has a lot fewer meta posts than my previous fandom (if only because it has exponentially more canon). I don't know, I want someone smarter than me to tackle it! *g*

I got everything from the comments here (http://community.livejournal.com/fbr_trash/1894571.html).

With RPF, you're trying to draw meaning and metaphor out of things that actually happened, instead of picking out themes that were actually deliberately put there, you know?

Whoa, kal, that totally expanded my mind, there. YES, that is a big difference -- from a writer/reader/consumer point of view, maybe a much bigger one than any I'd previously heard people talking about. ...But, yes, also, real life can be so, so fictional in terms of crazy coincidences and heavy-handed metaphors being forced on you and things no one would believe if you put them in a story. So... *tries to finish following your thought, can't, mind still blown from the first part*

I really love your posts. <3

instead of picking out themes that were actually deliberately put there, you know?

Which is something I tend to forget, maybe that's why this comparison comes as such a surprise. I tend to think of fiction as being real and just react to it directly as you would to life, and forget that it's carefully constructed to present a meaning. And real life doesn't really feel all that real, so we're used to forming our own narratives out of it. So this idea was totally obscured for me. But in terms of interpreting the entertainment we're experiencing, yes, the output of an RPF fandom is surely going to be different for that reason! How cool!

I think you're completely right about the way that difference gets obscured! It's not something that's always obvious at all, because our minds are so intent on building a narrative that we'll do it regardless of material. I think the reason I even noticed it might be that in this fandom, I hear so many different explanations of actions that make me go "Wait, that's not right," or "Yes, I agree." It's an odd feeling, because in fiction fandoms, I almost never have any doubt about what the explanation is.

I really love you, and I'm so glad to see your posts turn up on my flist more these days! ♥ ♥ ♥

Brilliant.

Thanks!

Wow. I have bookmarked this post. I ♥ yr branez.

Hahaha, thank you! I'm flattered. <3

I have nothing intelligent to add, but I just wanted to say that I love reading your posts and this RPF commentary is fascinating.

Awww, thank you so much! I sometimes post about really random crap, so it's great to hear that you enjoy it, and it's not always nonsense. :D

kalpurna

I've been reading Iron Man fic and I haven't even seen the movie yet. :(

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April