Someday, I am going to make a post entirely free of capslock. When I do: call an ambulance. [kalpurna]

Lately, Pete has been spelling shit correctly in his blog posts – or, at least, there don't seem to be any accidental typos. THIS IS HUGE FOR ME, PEOPLE. Is it the iPhone??? Is it just that he found a real computer for once? I really hope it's the iPhone, because that means he'll keep doing it. (Maybe next: CAPITAL LETTERS. DARE TO DREAM.)

Doctor Who. Doctor fucking Who, I love you so hard. I can't imagine that anyone who cares hasn't seen the finale yet, but just in case.

Here's the thing: the Who finale, the whole damn seasonal arc, actually, was about us. Yeah, us. The fans. Not only "the fans", actually, but the fangirls, OUR kind of fans – the female-built fan spaces, the fanfiction and fansites and community-building, text-analysing, overidentifying FANS. The medical students. GOD I LOVE IT. OH MAN. Stop blogging, says the Doctor – keep blogging, says the metatext. You're not good enough, Martha, says the Doctor – you're too good, says the metatext. You deserve better, says the metatext, because damn, you are so fucking cool, you with your storytelling, you with your viral marketing, you with your motherfucking fandom. Yeah, that's right. You.

For similar but better takes on this, see: here, here, ETA: here.

I know there's a lot of meta going down in that fandom right now about Women in Refrigerators, and about race, and I just – okay. I am totally not saying that those things are not legitimate to bring up, or that they are not problems, because I'm not ignorant enough to say the first, and I'm just ignorant enough (of the meta that's already out there) to not try and argue the second. But you guys, I still – I don't have statistics, I don't have sophisticated data. All I know is that the feeling I get, the HUNCH I have about this show, is that it loves us. The writers, they love us. They're trying, they really, really are. If they're being racist or sexist, I really, really do think it's an accident. That doesn't mean you can't point it out! I'm just – I just want to make sure we're keeping a tiny bit of perspective here. SGA has never, ever, had one tenth of the intelligent commentary on gender and race and dear lord, sexuality, that Who has, and I think we should... keep that in mind. Okay? That's all. Just keep in mind that out of all the fandoms out there, out of comics fandom and SGA and Smallville and even RPS, DW is not the enemy.

I went and read what you guys wrote about me in the anonymous love meme, and then I cried. I love you TOO. Also, akdsjaflkjsfd I wish it wasn't anonymous, because omg, TEASES!!! (Hahahahaha, except those of you who fail at anonymity. Anonywhat?) ILU TOOOOOO, OH GOSH. HEARTS AND HEARTS. ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

SPEAKING of anonymity (whoa, was that not an amazing segue?) I keep thinking about Gerard and alcoholism, oh my God, pretty much all the time. While I've never been in recovery myself, I do have a certain amount of familiarity with what it means to get sober, and with AA in particular, and oh. Man. I want so much fic about Gerard's sponsor, you guys. SO MUCH. Yeah, sure, I know Dira already wrote all that amazing GSGF, but come on: I need mooooore. Was his sponsor someone from a rock band (God, I hope not)? Or more likely, was it someone totally normal, some – oh, some seventy-year-old woman who's been sober since her son died and who talks to Gerard on the phone for hours and hours when he's feeling weak; or some forty-year-old man who built a whole new life for himself after wrecking the first, who invites Gerard over for dinner with his wife and their two kids; or a grandfather or an ex-crack-addict or a basketball player or a librarian or all of the above. In AA, there's no authority to tell you who you should talk to – you just approach someone you like, someone who's been sober a while, and ask them to be your sponsor, and they accept or decline. Who would Gerard pick? What kind of person would take on some musician, seventeen days from rock bottom, going back out on tour within a week? Does he still have the same sponsor? How often do they talk? Does she live in Jersey? Does he invite Gerard to his daughter's wedding? I'm sure people don't write about this because they feel it's inappropriate, or they don't know enough about the situation, or they just find it depressing, and I'm not saying those aren't valid reasons. I'm just saying that I want to read it.

And – and. I know that what I just said applies EVEN MORE to what I'm about to say, because wow, this crosses a whole bunch of comfort lines for people, I'm sure, but. AA is a religious, or at least spiritual, organization. It – there's a lot of talk about higher powers. There's a lot of faith. For many people, it serves a similar role to church. And I want to know what Gerard thinks about that so, so, so badly. Uhm, someone write me RPF about alcoholism and religion: GO!

AND AND. (I wasn't kidding about me thinking about this all the time!) I also just want to say that I knew, I knew he was involved in AA, long before I heard specific canon to back it up, just from the way he talks about alcoholism and about himself. Searching and fearless moral inventory? See: all of LotMS. And oh, oh, I want to read the fic where he helps someone else get sober, because that's a big part of being in AA, and it's something that he would get behind so, so hard. Oh shit, you guys. He would get to save someone's life – for real. FOR REAL. Ohhhhh and I want to, oh fuck, I REALLY want to read the fic where GERARD is someone ELSE'S sponsor. OH MY GOD, WRITE ME THAT.

okay. okay. I'm done now.

HAHAHAHAHAHA PETE IS ON THE COVER OF SOME MAGAZINE SAYING HE'S "HALF-GAY". IT'S CALLED BISEXUAL, SWEETIEPIE. COME SIT WITH US AT THE QUEER TABLE. WE SAVED YOU SOME SEQUINS.

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eh, I've used "half-gay" before. Granted, I've been joking...
(dude, what magazine?)

Dude, I want to read Sponsor!Gerard so bad now. Thanks for that.

By the way, have you seen this? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9uugVWW_XE)

It's pretty much amazing.

there was a S2 marathon of DW on SciFi today, so of course I sat down and watched. My sister comes in at Army of Ghosts and goes "Oh my god, this is so bad!" So I had to rant at her for a while about the fact that she wasn't really watching and she didn't get it because she didn't understand the history and how these two things - the daleks and the cybermen - are fucking iconic and thats why it's so important that here they are talking to one another. I've been telling her lately that she needs to know her history, and she spouts back about her AP history credits, totally missing my point.

Anyway, I hate it when people come in and watch 5 minutes of a show and declare that it sucks. My whole family hates The Office, and I keep trying to explain that it's because they won't watch it long enough to get it, that a show can be funny without a laugh track if you take the time to understand the point of it. Same with DW, my sister sees the daleks and the cybermen, goes "ew, scifi" and "those robots look ridiculous" and doesn't take the time to see what's really going on. It pisses me off. *sigh*

[link] [reply]

oh, me too! Or I've been like "I'm a little bit gay!" It's just funny because it's him, and because of the PICTURE that accompanies it. PETE. NEVER CHANGE (http://icecreamhdaches.livejournal.com/120675.html#cutid1).

HOW HAS SPONSOR GERARD NOT BEEN WRITTEN. He... saves lives????

Man, that's annoying. Yeah, I'm not an old-school fan, so I try REALLY hard to pick up all the history that is being reflected in the new stuff. How can you judge something if you're missing half the impact it has, because you don't know the canon? (There go my fannish instincts again.)

[link] [parent] [reply]

*dies* OH PETE WENTZ, ilu! I can't wait to read that article!
(Did that cover say august07? do I really have to wait a month to read the full story behind that quote?)

I mean, even just watching a full episode with someone there to help you out with character history! Give it that before you declare that it sucks!

Dude, you know what should totally exist for bandom? A community full of fic requests. People post with things they want to see, and people looking for inspiration go there for ideas, then link what they've written in a comment.

A community for fic requests? I think we could call it MY JOURNAL. I am a one woman demand-a-thon. SIGH.

Usually magazines are dated a month ahead, I DON'T KNOW WHY. So hopefully, it should be scanned soon!

!!!

(magazines are weird)

It's just funny because it's him, and because of the PICTURE that accompanies it. PETE. NEVER CHANGE.

That is Mikey's straightening iron: y/y?

\o/

It totally is!
(except Pete totally doesn't think it's weird that someone wants to film him straightening his hair)

I'm sure people don't write about this because they feel it's inappropriate, or they don't know enough about the situation, or they just find it depressing, and I'm not saying those aren't valid reasons. I'm just saying that I want to read it.

I hope this doesn't make me sound like a total ass but if people write about all sorts of sexual things...AA fic shouldn't be that bad. I would love to read this fic too, I had never thought about it and I guess I never really thought about Gerard in AA...it appears that I just don't think about much of anything. Heh. I would just love to read a really in depth character piece about him going through that struggle, it could be so very enjoyable (in an odd way).

Oh, dude, TOTALLY valid point – we write (uhhhh, some of us write) MPREG! And RAPE! Why should alcoholism be taboo? Although, just to play devil's advocate, the AA thing is actually a part of the real dude's life, that was probably pretty traumatic for him, and I can see how that would squick people. There's a lot of people who can't cope with reading slash about dudes who are married IRL, too. RPS leads to different comfort zones for different people, and I respect that!

THAT SAID – I reaaaaaaally want to read that fic. Really, really, really.

I totally hear what you are saying, totally. I forget sometimes that other people don't think just like me, of course I'm kidding but only to a point. This could totally delve into an much deeper discussion (or just blathering on my part)but it's always interesting for me to see that people have an easier time with things that I would think give them pause and a hard time with things that to me...not so big. I'm yammering.

I tl;dr-d all over Dira below! I dunno, I've been kind of thinky about RPS meta lately. Hmmmmm.

I AM TOTALLY STEALTH AND ANONYMOUS. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. (TOTES LOVE YOU TOO)

And why do you ALWAYS MAKE ME NEED THINGS I DIDN'T KNOW I WANTED? BOO WHORE.

ILUUUUU.

Uhm, that is why you love me, obvs! I put INTERESTING THOUGHTS in your head!

oh, GERAAAAAAAARD.

I COULD WRITE MORE.

I did, actually, feel really weird entering the fandom by writing about Gerard going to AA, because that felt really intrusive, because... I dunno. Making out with Frankie is something Gerard sells, you know? Going to meetings is not (well, except that it kind of is, or is something that he gives away for free because he wants everyone to have it, but in my head it is still not quite the same thing as making out with Frank on stage).

...but then I got over that and got back to writing about Gerard Being More or Less Okay. Which reminds me that there's a story I need to finish writing. *g*

Which reminds me that there's a story I need to finish writing. *g*

Yes please. :)

ADFJKALSFDKJ I WOULD LIKE THAT VERY MUCH. :D

Yeah, dude, I respect that discomfort! It's so – RPS is so funny that way. Everyone has different lines, and I can see how that one would cause problems for some people. I guess the way I get around it mentally is that, well. Gerard isn't really selling his boykissing, exactly; he's not doing it to gain fans, I truly believe. He's doing it because he wants that to be the kind of thing his fans see, and think about, and have fun with. He's using his position to put that image into our heads, force that to be part of our world, for us to deal with it. And he's also using his position to make sure people know about alcoholism, and recovery, and that he's been through it, and we can make it too. (There's five dudes just as fucked up...) Fanfiction, for me, is not an essentially trivial activity, no matter how trivial it seems on the surface – it's a way for me to better understand the world around me, to work through my issues, to think more deeply about my life and the lives of others. Like all fiction, only more so, because it's so interpretative. It matters to me. It means something. And Gerard – he matters to me, too. All that stuff he gives me – all that honesty, those lyrics, the Whole Gerard Thing – he wants me to have so that I can make something meaningful out of it, so that I can take it in and gain something from it, be stronger, be happier. If he didn't, he wouldn't talk about it, he wouldn't give us that honesty. I feel very comfortable writing fic about Gerard, because hell, he wants to save my life? This is actually one of the best ways he can do that – by letting me take in what he gives me and reinterpret it, gain meaning from it.

Uhm, that sure got rambly and tl;dr, didn't it!

YES PLEASE, I APPROVE

Yeah, sorry, "selling" is sort of shorthand for this whole mental model I have of RPS (which is, basically, that there's the real Gerard who exists in the world as a real person, and then there's my Gerard doll that I play with, and the Gerard doll is something I 'bought' from Gerard, made of all the public-persona stuff he 'sells' - and it's not that I don't believe the stuff I buy - I wouldn't buy it if I didn't - but it's still all stuff he puts out there in a way that, say, his relationship with Eliza wasn't (which is why I don't have an Eliza doll, aside from the fact that, yeah, I wouldn't be all that interested in having one if it were for sale) and, wow, this is a very labyrinthine little parenthetical comment). And, no, I completely agree with you about fic being non-trivial, because between the amount of work I put into it sometimes and the fact that I kind of wind up understanding everything about the world through fic in some way or other, I'm right there with you.

My RPS lines, such as they exist, are mostly about who's asking for it and who's not, who's offering themselves as a persona and a fantasy object and who isn't. Gerard Way: asking for it. Pro hockey player: not asking for it. Moderately famous actor: maybe asking for it, maybe not. Anybody dating a member of My Chem: not asking for it. Ray Toro: answer unclear. And so on. So when I was first writing Gerard, I think I felt like AA might fall in not-asking-for-it territory, because it's not glamorous and it's not on-stage and whatever. Except then I realized that we only know about it because Gerard wants us to know about it and, you know, hell yes my Gerard doll is a recovering addict and in AA, so why not write about that as well as everything else? So yes.

...apologies if that was totally incoherent as well as tl;dr. *g*

the thing i love SO MUCH about Who? is that the commentary on race and gender and sexuality and HUMANITY, we're getting all of this in a family show. a CHILDREN'S SHOW. Who is historically for kids. and i get that it's a bit of a different animal now, but even so. we'd never get something of that quality in this country, would we? where the most in-depth analysis of LGBT issues is the occasional fag joke on a crappy sitcom.

so yeah. yay Who. (and yay internets that i can have Who without having to move across oceans.)

::goes to read links::

Well, what's more important than it being a kid's show is that it's a popular show. Which is awesome! Anything approaching this level of analysis on any one of those issues would only be found on HBO or Showtime or something else not on basic cable. And it wouldn't get very high ratings which would probably lead to its cancellation after about a season and a half, even though it might win an Emmy for that first season.

SciFi premiered S3 tonight. We're a full season behind. So yay internets, indeed!

Forget that – can you even process the fact that TORCHWOOD is successful? Because I CAN'T.

You mean that show where all the lead characters have had at least one homoerotic experience on screen? That show where the traditional binary system of sexuality doesn't so much exist? Gee, I see no problems with a show like that having major commercial success in the US. *eyeroll*

It's a good show. I enjoy it muchly. Thank gia for TV Links. And the fact that Who and Torchwood weren't originally picked up by Fox.

yeah, the popular thing, i think that's what i was trying to get at (and failing, hi).

probably lead to its cancellation

thank god Who doesn't air on FOX.

yay internets, because cable's too expensive!

Also yay internets because even if I did live on the right side of the pond, my schedule is far too chaotic to be able to watch during airtime every week.

thank the gods indeed.

No dude, I KNOW. I KNOOOOW. That's what makes me so wince-y about all the anger, without reading one word of it – it's that, okay, THEY ARE DOING PRETTY WELL, and even when they're not, they're TRYING, and even when they're not trying, THEY'RE A SUPER POPULAR MAINSTREAM FORMER CHILDREN'S SHOW WITH A PANSEXUAL DUDE AND PROMINENT STRONG FEMALE CHARACTERS HELLO WHAT.

LET'S LOOK AT THE HALF-FULL GLASS, SHALL WE.

I'm not saying their arguments are invalid, I'm not. I'm just saying we might want to cut the show a tiny, infinitesimal amount of slack.

there's anger? what kind of anger? (i just watch, i don't read fic or hunt down meta.)

There is huuuuuge racewank (http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1091135.html#cutid1). HUGE. Possibly worse than SGA. And some feminist anger, too, floating around. WITHOUT INVALIDATING THEIR DISCOMFORT IN ANY WAY: it makes me tired just to hear about in passing.

actually, let me revise that statement, because now that I'm poking around a little more, it seems like people are being pretty intelligent and civil, and I really DO think people should be not only allowed but encouraged to address the hard stuff. But... I still think Doctor Who is doing better than most shows. GLASS HALF FULL.

* HAHAHAHAHAHA PETE IS ON THE COVER OF SOME MAGAZINE SAYING HE'S "HALF-GAY". IT'S CALLED BISEXUAL, SWEETIEPIE. COME SIT WITH US AT THE QUEER TABLE. WE SAVED YOU SOME SEQUINS.

...oh my god, I love you SO MUCH. We saved you some sequins. oh my GOD. srsly, that should be on a t-shirt.

♥ ♥ ♥

I LOVE YOU TOO. It is kind of my motto in life, honestly! I am just that kind of girl: I will always save you some sequins. :D

*twirls and twirls and TWIRLS you*

Your post gives me glee.

And where is this magazine cover???? Is it up online??? Doesn't he know 'half-gay' already has its own word and everything??? Thats what the 'B' is in LGBT is!!!!!!!

Oh, Pete.

Oh, heavens, I totally wish I had even a smidge of talent so I could write Sober!Gerard with his sponsor, but as is if anyone does write that, or Sponsor!Gerard, please for the big gay bands link me to it because that is an awesome idea.

The whole race-wank thing with Who irritates me to a great extent because the majority of people wanking about it? Are from the US. Where the black/white race relations are totally different. Not that there isn't any in the UK, but that they're very different.

Plus? If people in the UK are gonna be racist? Asian (...in the UK-sense, i.e. Indian/Pakistani etc.) people are going to get the first bat there.

Black/White racism of course exists over here (a sad but true fact) but it is worlds away from the relations in the US (minly because we sold slaves and didn't keep them and then banned even that. So when it all kicked off we could go "What?" and didn't end up with a whole section of the population pissed off that their families were/had been slaves) and it is wrong to apply US race models to a show written and made in the UK.

Dude - I'm sorry, that became a whole diatribe in your journal!

On a nicer note - I think... Gerard. You know my love for Gerard and that love spills over into almost enything. I'd read soemthing AA-related and probably love it with all my heart (see: Dira :D ) but to me Gerard's life in that way? Is like the perfect canon. I can't help but love his struggles and want to hear more, but I want to hear it from him. I want HIM to tell me about how he coped and how it felt because somehow I connect with that and it makes me love him all the more.

There's a reason why The Sharpest Lives is my favourite MCR song. "And you can take all the pain away from me, A kiss and I will surrender". I just - yeah.

I think when you and I are in the same country the Gerard-love will cause a singularity that pulls in Gerard and doesn't allow him to escape. And I'm ok with that. It also makes me feel kinda like Gabe, and I'm ok with that too.

And pls to be ignoring my typs, ys?

ANOTHER IMPORTANT BANDSLASH QUESTION FROM TEH N00B!

Has someone already written the INCREDIBLY OBVIOUS Due South / Bandslash crossover that results from Gerard Way so TOTALLY BEING the illegitimate son of Benton Fraser? Srsly:

http://lamardeuse.dreamhost.com/ds/ds5.jpg
http://www.petitionspot.com/uploads/33790-gerard12.jpg
http://home.hiwaay.net/~warydbom/duesouth/interviews/TOR18.jpg

and especially this one ahahahahhaha: http://blogs.citypages.com/dcody/images/largemsg11358169670224bj.jpg

Because hello, it's so totally an AU TRUE FACT. And god, Ray Vecchio and Pete Wentz in the same room? WORTH WRITING FOR.

Half-gay with straighteners makes you at least three-quarters gay, in my experience.

Oh man. You have me thinking about this. About Gerard and a sponsor.

I may even post about this.

kalpurna

Someday, I am going to make a post entirely free of capslock. When I do: call an ambulance.

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April